{"id":7163,"date":"2011-06-15T14:55:43","date_gmt":"2011-06-15T11:55:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.criserb.com\/blog\/cum-sa-te-distrezi-in-supermarket.html"},"modified":"2011-06-15T14:59:44","modified_gmt":"2011-06-15T11:59:44","slug":"cum-sa-te-distrezi-in-supermarket","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.criserb.com\/blog\/cum-sa-te-distrezi-in-supermarket\/","title":{"rendered":"Cum sa te distrezi in supermarket"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>1. Ia 24 de cutii de prezervative \u015fi lini\u015ftit pune-le in carucioare la al\u0163i cump\u0103r\u0103tori.    <br \/>2. \u00cen sec\u0163ia de electrice porneste alarma la toate ceasurile, astfel \u00eenc\u00e2t ele sa sune la fiecare 5 minute.     <br \/>3. Cu ajutorul sucului de rosii fa pe podea o urma care s\u0103 duc\u0103 spre wc.     <br \/>4. Pune un cort \u00een sec\u0163iunea pentru turism si spune altor cump\u0103r\u0103tori ca ii inviti cu bucurie \u00een cort daca aduc o perna din sec\u0163ia respectiva.     <br \/>5. Cand se apropie vreo v\u00e2nz\u0103toare \u015fi te \u00eentreaba dac\u0103 te poate ajuta, \u00eencepe s\u0103 pl\u00e2ngi tare \u015fi sa strigi: &quot;Lasa-m\u0103 \u00een pace&quot;. <\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>6. Intoarce spre tine una din camerele de supraveghere video, uita-te la ea ca in oglind\u0103 si \u00een acela\u015fi timp scobeste-te \u00een nas.    <br \/>7. Examinand un set de cutite de bucatarie, intreaba vanzatoarea: Unde pot cumpara ceva calmante?     <br \/>8. Poarta-te in supermarket suspicios, fluier\u00e2nd o melodie din filmul &quot;Misiune imposibil\u0103&quot;.     <br \/>9. Ascunde-te \u00een spatele hainelor iar atunci c\u00e2nd cineva se opre\u015fte s\u0103 se uite, \u015fopteste-i: &quot;Ia-m\u0103 pe mine!&quot; Ia-m\u0103 pe mine &quot;!     <br \/>10.Auzind un anun\u0163, aseaza-te imediat jos \u00eentr-o pozi\u0163ie ciudat\u0103 \u015fi striga: &quot;Oh, la naiba, iarasi aceste voci!&quot;     <br \/>12. Du-te \u00een cabina de prob\u0103 \u015fi dup\u0103 ceva timp striga: &quot;Hei, aici iarasi s-a terminat h\u00eertia igienica!&quot;<\/p>\n<p align=\"right\">[<a href=\"http:\/\/www.mioritice.com\/banc\/30137\/\" target=\"_blank\">via<\/a>]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>1. Ia 24 de cutii de prezervative \u015fi lini\u015ftit pune-le in carucioare la al\u0163i cump\u0103r\u0103tori. 2. \u00cen sec\u0163ia de electrice porneste alarma la toate ceasurile, astfel \u00eenc\u00e2t ele sa sune la fiecare 5 minute. 3. Cu ajutorul sucului de rosii fa pe podea o urma care s\u0103 duc\u0103 spre wc. 4. Pune un cort \u00een&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[7074,1921],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v24.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Cum sa te distrezi in supermarket<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.criserb.com\/blog\/cum-sa-te-distrezi-in-supermarket\/\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"criserb\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"1 minute\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" 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